I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
what the fuck happened to the tacos
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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