We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Randomize
