i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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