Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize
