Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
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