So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
