on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
