I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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