I CAN MOONWALK!
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
