I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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