Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Randomize
