I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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