p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
3 2 1 whiskey
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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