fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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