I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
