I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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