Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
The adults are the big ones right?
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
