so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I will pee on everything he values.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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