Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize
