I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
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