I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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