yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
