i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
The Olympian is in my bed
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize