If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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