Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
it's like heaven, but drunker
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
