walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
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I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I deserve to be covered in dicks
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
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We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk