Texts From Last Night

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  (240): View more from Maryland

  ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow

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  (240): ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow http://tfl.nu/mdzc
  Replies (10) Good night (2575) Bad night (592)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life

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  (802): Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life http://tfl.nu/rdws
  Replies (37) Good night (771) Bad night (3230)
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  (619): View more from California

  i wish my penis had a tongue

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  (619): i wish my penis had a tongue http://tfl.nu/t048
  Replies (30) Good night (4115) Bad night (758)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me

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  (201): I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me http://tfl.nu/61f7
  Replies (24) Good night (648) Bad night (6338)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.

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  (208): His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood. http://tfl.nu/55rt
  Replies (14) Good night (4920) Bad night (1564)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.

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  (615): My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed. http://tfl.nu/zn3p
  Replies (22) Good night (5169) Bad night (1035)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.

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  (717): I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into. http://tfl.nu/2oug
  Replies (13) Good night (801) Bad night (3106)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.

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  (248): He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased. http://tfl.nu/h9lw
  Replies (8) Good night (1867) Bad night (663)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.

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  (724): You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails. http://tfl.nu/klfg
  Replies (15) Good night (1880) Bad night (783)
• Favorite

  (424): View more from California

  I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.

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  (424): I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster. (479): This lesson is brought you by a psychology class. http://tfl.nu/4ga3
  Replies (8) Good night (1420) Bad night (317)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun

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  (760): Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun http://tfl.nu/taap
  Replies (8) Good night (1141) Bad night (287)
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  (469): View more from Texas

  I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...

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  (469): I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom... http://tfl.nu/pwb7
  Replies (9) Good night (1060) Bad night (532)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?

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  (785): And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney? http://tfl.nu/o9bx
  Replies (0) Good night (241) Bad night (226)
• Favorite

  (620): View more from Kansas

  I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..

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  (620): I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life.. http://tfl.nu/aqyo
  Replies (3) Good night (439) Bad night (197)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.

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  (318): Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows. http://tfl.nu/7891
  Replies (0) Good night (428) Bad night (219)

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