Texts From Last Night

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  (515): View more from Iowa

  Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms

  (712): View more from Iowa

  Oh God

  (515): View more from Iowa

  I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship

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  (515): Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms (712): Oh God (515): I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship http://tfl.nu/mj00
  Replies (31) Good night (1182) Bad night (2067)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him

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  (336): he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down (919): i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him http://tfl.nu/upw6
  Replies (67) Good night (3929) Bad night (1160)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game

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  (304): But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game http://tfl.nu/osln
  Replies (23) Good night (5698) Bad night (964)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers

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  (205): i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers http://tfl.nu/g3p7
  Replies (25) Good night (6754) Bad night (1040)
• Favorite

  (786): View more from Florida

  hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.

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  (786): hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night. http://tfl.nu/2z1d
  Replies (8) Good night (4967) Bad night (1434)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  Why is your vibrator in the fridge?

  (1-760): View more from California

  I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.

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  (760): Why is your vibrator in the fridge? (1-760): I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there. http://tfl.nu/7etk
  Replies (40) Good night (6945) Bad night (1377)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.

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  (407): I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying. http://tfl.nu/u472
  Replies (30) Good night (9075) Bad night (1055)
• Favorite

  (940): View more from Texas

  Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.

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  (940): Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America. http://tfl.nu/rtd9
  Replies (13) Good night (4088) Bad night (767)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.

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  (301): Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/mimi
  Replies (21) Good night (2496) Bad night (1205)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".

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  (713): You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress". http://tfl.nu/1fwn
  Replies (3) Good night (1271) Bad night (548)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.

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  (505): Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard. http://tfl.nu/5mz2
  Replies (17) Good night (3291) Bad night (541)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though

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  (601): Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though http://tfl.nu/7jbg
  Replies (25) Good night (1326) Bad night (2710)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.

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  (336): he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever. http://tfl.nu/31ik
  Replies (16) Good night (565) Bad night (2248)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.

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  (406): There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing. http://tfl.nu/ymyj
  Replies (0) Good night (688) Bad night (280)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  You pole danced in your parka.

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  (443): You pole danced in your parka. http://tfl.nu/lknf
  Replies (4) Good night (606) Bad night (253)

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