u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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