Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
