using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Randomize
