: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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