Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
We don't watch enough power rangers
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
