I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Randomize
