those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
high people should be assigned attendants
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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