Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
