Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
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