last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
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