Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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