but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
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