Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
so much tequila, so little girl.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
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