Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
My penis needs a shock collar
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize