just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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