Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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