when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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