I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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