Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
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