Texts From Last Night

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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house

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  (732): so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house http://tfl.nu/3ust
  Replies (18) Good night (652) Bad night (3937)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?

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  (303): I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day? http://tfl.nu/tvel
  Replies (19) Good night (3006) Bad night (711)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  .....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......

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  (847): .....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party...... http://tfl.nu/uwbu
  Replies (7) Good night (1509) Bad night (4250)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.

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  (203): Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door. http://tfl.nu/li4e
  Replies (10) Good night (4693) Bad night (648)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.

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  (708): so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me. http://tfl.nu/mwnt
  Replies (58) Good night (14441) Bad night (1311)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?

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  (727): I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there? http://tfl.nu/2pix
  Replies (105) Good night (38982) Bad night (1982)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.

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  (901): I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas. http://tfl.nu/166i
  Replies (2) Good night (2545) Bad night (786)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night

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  (978): hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night http://tfl.nu/n6zz
  Replies (3) Good night (1947) Bad night (530)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?

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  (520): He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA? http://tfl.nu/u8oz
  Replies (4) Good night (806) Bad night (928)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.

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  (+61): It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls. http://tfl.nu/jcbb
  Replies (1) Good night (1129) Bad night (489)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow

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  (304): Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow http://tfl.nu/l8ph
  Replies (10) Good night (3990) Bad night (671)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.

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  (413): Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life. http://tfl.nu/hq06
  Replies (5) Good night (1022) Bad night (435)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later

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  (425): I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later http://tfl.nu/4jkk
  Replies (3) Good night (1122) Bad night (287)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.

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  (901): She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right. http://tfl.nu/eqzr
  Replies (7) Good night (1032) Bad night (386)
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  (830): View more from Texas

  Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.

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  (830): Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true. http://tfl.nu/sjks
  Replies (2) Good night (476) Bad night (379)

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