Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  hey call me

  (810): View more from Michigan

  can't. in the shower.

  (734): View more from Michigan

  ... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (734): hey call me (810): can't. in the shower. (734): ... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time. http://tfl.nu/i884
  Replies (9) Good night (1534) Bad night (615)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (281): I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian. http://tfl.nu/ky2c
  Replies (51) Good night (3668) Bad night (668)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much? (617): how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore? http://tfl.nu/k1y1
  Replies (104) Good night (4004) Bad night (859)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca. (412): That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia. http://tfl.nu/lbkk
  Replies (84) Good night (2670) Bad night (887)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to? http://tfl.nu/b64u
  Replies (21) Good night (4270) Bad night (770)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  so no drinking for you?

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  don't be silly

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party (423): so no drinking for you? (615): don't be silly http://tfl.nu/xiol
  Replies (50) Good night (9679) Bad night (936)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  i flashed his best friends last night

  (1-416): View more from Toronto

  you always were good at making good first impressions

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (416): i flashed his best friends last night (1-416): you always were good at making good first impressions http://tfl.nu/b564
  Replies (10) Good night (3884) Bad night (1470)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory. http://tfl.nu/a6d4
  Replies (4) Good night (2265) Bad night (1233)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain. http://tfl.nu/6bo4
  Replies (1) Good night (488) Bad night (815)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us. http://tfl.nu/nid9
  Replies (3) Good night (459) Bad night (866)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.

  (941): View more from Florida

  I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar. (941): I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket. http://tfl.nu/b83h
  Replies (4) Good night (632) Bad night (731)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Swish.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (774): Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car. (508): Swish. http://tfl.nu/6xy2
  Replies (8) Good night (765) Bad night (463)
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (321): Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in! http://tfl.nu/gz21
  Replies (1) Good night (571) Bad night (346)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve. http://tfl.nu/vuq2
  Replies (0) Good night (601) Bad night (218)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on. http://tfl.nu/j7fi
  Replies (1) Good night (710) Bad night (295)

Randomize