Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
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