so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
You're breaking my sexual little heart
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
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