His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
