So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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