help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Randomize