lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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