So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
